Introduction
Today’s lesson discusses the eternal doctrines associated with the covenant of eternal marriage. Some members of the Church enjoy wonderful marriages; others do not.
Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve counseled:
“We know that many worthy and wonderful Latter-day Saints currently lack the ideal opportunities and essential requirements for their progress. Singleness, childlessness, death, and divorce frustrate ideals and postpone the fulfillment of promised blessings. In addition, some women who desire to be full-time mothers and homemakers have been literally compelled to enter the full-time workforce. But these frustrations are only temporary. The Lord has promised that in the eternities no blessing will be denied his sons and daughters who keep the commandments, are true to their covenants, and desire what is right.
“Many of the most important deprivations of mortality will be set right in the Millennium, which is the time for fulfilling all that is incomplete in the great plan of happiness for all of our Father’s worthy children. We know that will be true of temple ordinances. I believe it will also be true of family relationships and experiences” (in Conference Report, Oct. 1993, 101; or Ensign, Nov. 1993, 75).
If your family circumstances today are not what you would like, please remember these comforting words by Elder Oaks, and the oft-repeated counsel by the Brethren to live worthy of every blessing you wish to receive.
Eternal marriage is essential in Heavenly Father’s plan
Read D&C 132:5-6. What are some of the reasons given in these verses for the new and everlasting covenant of marriage?
Verse 5 – So we can receive a blessing at God’s hand
Verse 6 – To bring about the fulness of God’s glory
How does God bring about His glory? By bringing about the immortality and eternal life of us! (See Moses 1:39). God makes this covenant available for us for our mortal and eternal happiness.
Mortal happiness
After Parlely P. Pratt heard the Prophet Joseph teach the doctrines of eternal marriage, he said: “I had loved before, but I knew not why. But now I loved—with a pureness—an intensity of elevated, exalted feeling, which would lift my soul. … I felt that God was my heavenly Father indeed; that Jesus was my brother, and that the wife of my bosom was an immortal, eternal companion. … In short, I could now love with the spirit and with the understanding also” (Autobiography of Parley P. Pratt [1975], 298).
Eternal happiness
The First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles have declared that “marriage between man and woman is essential to [God’s] eternal plan.” Why is that? Read D&C 131:1–4. If we do not receive and keep this covenant, in a certain sense we are stopped in our progress.
Religiously, the word “damn” is used to mean being cut off or alienated from God. In English, the word “dam” sounds the same, but means to stop water in its progress; to hold it back. This helps me think in a new way about the consequences of willingly refusing to make or failing to keep the covenants we make with God. We will be cut off from his presence and/or stopped in our progress. In a sense, we can be dammed – or stopped – even in the
Read D&C 132:19-21, and watch for the blessings promised to those who faithfully keep their covenants, including:
- They will be together “in time, and through all eternity” (D&C 132:19). Their children may also be part of their eternal family. (You may want to explain that the Holy Spirit of Promise is the Holy Ghost, who confirms that the priesthood ordinances we have received and the covenants we have made are acceptable to God. This approval depends on our faithfulness.)
- They will “inherit thrones, kingdoms, principalities, … powers, [and] dominions” (D&C 132:19).
- They will continue to have seed, or spirit children, throughout eternity (D&C 132:19, 30–31; see also D&C 131:4).
- “They shall be gods, because they have all power” (D&C 132:20–21).
President Boyd K. Packer of the Quorum of the Twelve taught: “The ultimate purpose of all we teach is to unite parents and children in faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, that they are happy at home, sealed in an eternal marriage, linked to their generations, and assured of exaltation in the presence of our Heavenly Father” (in Conference Report, Apr. 1995, 8; or Ensign, May 1995, 8).
President Joseph Fielding Smith said: “Marriage, as understood by Latter-day Saints, is a covenant ordained to be everlasting. It is the foundation for eternal exaltation, for without it there could be no eternal progress in the
Loving each other is not enough to obtain this blessing
Summarize D&C 132:7-18
7 And verily I say unto you, that the conditions of this law are these: All covenants… that are not made and entered into and sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise… are of no … force in and after the resurrection from the dead; for all contracts that are not made unto this end have an end when men are dead…
13 And everything that is in the world, whether it be ordained of men, by thrones, or principalities, or powers, or things of name, whatsoever they may be, that are not by me or by my word, saith the Lord, shall be thrown down, and shall not remain after men are dead, neither in nor after the resurrection, saith the Lord your God…
18 And again, verily I say unto you, if a man marry a wife, and make a covenant with her for time and for all eternity, if that covenant is not by me or by my word, which is my law, and is not sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise, through him whom I have anointed and appointed unto this power, then it is not valid neither of force when they are out of the world, because they are not joined by me, saith the Lord, neither by my word…
Interestingly, the Doctrine and Covenants talks about making a covenant of eternal marriage “not by me or by my word.” Essentially, God is warning that mortals do not have the capacity to make eternal promises without his authority. I searched online for eternal marriage, trying to find who else claims to offer this great blessing. The search results were all either sites by the Church or its believers explaining the doctrine, or sites by others commenting on the Church’s doctrine. No other group that I could find promotes this doctrine. (Comically, Google also served up an ad from Amazon.com: Save on Eternal marriage. Free 2-Day Shipping with Amazon Prime.)
Abide in the covenant
Have a female class member read the following quotation. Then ask class members to guess who said it.
“I was just sure the first ten years would be bliss. But during our first year together I discovered … there were a lot of adjustments. Of course, they weren’t the kind of thing you ran home to mother about. But I cried into my pillow now and again. The problems were almost always related to learning to live on someone else’s schedule and to do things someone else’s way. We loved each other, there was no doubt about that. But we also had to get used to each other. I think every couple has to get used to each other.”
The statement was made by Sister Marjorie P. Hinckley, wife of President Gordon B. Hinckley (in Sheri L. Dew, Go Forward with Faith: The Biography of Gordon B. Hinckley [1996], 118). Emphasize that it takes love, work, and dedication to have a successful marriage. When a man and woman are sealed in the temple, they will receive the promised blessings only if they “abide in [the] covenant” (D&C 132:19).
Read D&C 42:22. This commandment applies equally to men and women. What does it mean to love a husband or wife with all one’s heart? What does it mean to cleave to a husband or wife and none else?
President Spencer W. Kimball explained:
“When the Lord says all thy heart, it allows for no sharing nor dividing nor depriving. …
“The words none else eliminate everyone and everything. The spouse then becomes preeminent in the life of the husband or wife, and neither social life nor occupational life nor political life nor any other interest nor person nor thing shall ever take precedence over the companion spouse. …
“Marriage presupposes total allegiance and total fidelity. Each spouse takes the partner with the understanding that he or she gives totally to the spouse all the heart, strength, loyalty, honor, and affection, with all dignity. Any divergence is sin; any sharing of the heart is transgression. As we should have ‘an eye single to the glory of God,’ so should we have an eye, an ear, a heart single to the marriage and the spouse and family” (Faith Precedes the Miracle [1972], 142–43).
President Gordon B. Hinckley gave this simple counsel to married couples: “Be fiercely loyal one to another” (Ensign, Feb. 1999, 4).
When a man and woman are married in the temple, they covenant to be true to one another and to be true to the Lord. What are some things that married couples can do to strengthen their love for each other and for the Lord? (Answers could include praying and reading the scriptures together, seeking to be guided by the Spirit together, holding family home evening, going on dates together, taking time to talk to one another, helping one another around the house, and attending the temple together.)
Conclusion
We finish where we began. Each of us is responsible for the actions of only one person – ourselves. The eternal marriage covenant is unique in that it includes three people – ourselves, our spouse, and God. We know God will keep his part of the covenant. We can influence and encourage our spouse to keep his or her part of the covenant, but we cannot force them to do so. Ultimately, the only person we have control over is ourselves. We are responsible to choose to keep our covenants as fully as possible with God’s help. Then we can confidently wait on the Lord for the complete fulfillment of all promised blessings in His own time.
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